Stone Cold Crazy or Batshit?

Not that I have anything against bats! In fact, I love sitting here on these longer evenings watching the little feckers darting around my back garden. Why do I feel continued need to explain myself?

My long-suffering friend Les reintroduced me to some old Queen songs over the past couple of weekends. These encounters take place in a free space, a man shack, where beer can be swallowed, and shite can be talked, and nobody gets offended. In fact, if some form of abuse is not received one can feel somewhat offended. A song called ‘Mustapha Ibrahim’ really got my old juices flowing again. I thought to myself and out loud ‘I wonder if Freddie would get away with that in today’s ever so politically correct climate’? More to the point, would Freddie get away with being himself if he was still alive?

I first saw Queen performing ‘Crazy Little Thing Called Love’ on Top Of The Pops way back in day when pubic hairs were just sprouting. I recall the bit in the video when Freddie got his t-shirt ripped off by two scantily clad ladies in PVC outfits. I also recall my mother exclaiming ‘oh my god! Would you like at the cut of yer man?’ That statement in itself needs explaining to the un-irish amongst you but I’m not going to as this is my blog and I can write whatever the hell I like on it without always having to explain myself. I discovered at the time that it was the scantily clad ladies that caused that unknown and yet undiscovered stirring in places some refuse to admit exists. I thought Freddie was just a bit weird.

Fast forward a lifetime of mistakes, regrets and balls ups mixed with knowledge, amazing people and love; mucho love. Some might even call it ‘experience’. All experience/knowledge, good or bad is constantly changing. We are constantly bombarded with the knowledge and experience of others. Environment, space time and circumstance also play a major role in who we are. I’ve learnt so much from the baul Sri Sri fella and I’d encourage anyone living in the UK or anywhere else for that matter to look up The Art of Living Foundation and sign up for a ‘Happiness Course’, nine and a half hours of your life, spread over a weekend that will change it forever.

And so, to the main reason of this rant/blog. When I wake up I normally check my phone to see what time it is, have a quick look on twitter to make sure that the world hasn’t exploded during the night and if there is anything interesting I might want to revisit later, once I sort my bobs and bits out. I viewed a picture on someone’s Tweet showing a noticeboard on London Underground. For those of you not aware sometimes someone at station writes a nice positive quote or sentiment in the off chance that a beleaguered commuter might just read it in passing and that it might put a smile on their face or heavens forbid give them pause for thought.

The notice board said “When you see something beautiful in someone, tell them. It might take a second to say but for them it could last a lifetime.” Nothing spectacular about that and I thought, ‘nice one, cool’ and in fact one of the things we are constantly reminded to do from the Art of Living Course is commit a random act of kindness to someone you don’t know each and every day. I then saw the words ‘sexual harassment’ and jumped out of bed to get to my laptop and investigate this further.

Upon further investigation I’ve seen that another person has given a five-point plan about why this might cause some sort of problem to some people in society. I mean fucking seriously! We can all be very clever at manipulating a sentence or picking up and worrying it to death like a wragged nail or a wee fecker of a jack russell with a bone, again nothing against nail, bones and or wee skips. But there is one thing that we are all forgetting and that is that we are nearly always born out of love. We grew up being given love and sharing it. It’s our natural state to be kind and loving. We need to be taught hate. Bitterness more than likely comes from our love being snubbed.

Over the past few months I’ve seen, read and heard a lot of nasty shit coming from people I love, respect and care about. It seems to me that you can’t make an innocent tongue and check remark about anything nowadays lest every word and sentence is deconstructed, worried to death and reconstructed to fit the purpose of said other. Maybe I’m doing the same?

And this is my point. Every word on here has been used somewhere else at some stage in time by another person to create a narrative (plagiarism). As a human being our points of view and attitudes change every day, depending on what you are reading or listening to. We are a product of our environment. How on earth can we tell someone how to feel when our own feelings are constantly changing. Oh, that’s the thing, they only change if you let them. I’m always open to suggestion and criticism mind you that’s not hard as I say what I feel and always speak the truth as I know it and normally don’t give a flying fuck what others think. A good example of this is my early thoughts of Freddie being weird are now that the man is a complete genius and his openness about who he was has my greatest respect.

I’ve not been in the best of shape or form lately due to ongoing health problems and it was only yesterday that I realised my mood and reaction to others was nothing to do with them but about me. Someone mentioned that things can get lost in translation and in my last blog another person didn’t get what I said. By reading the thread about the tube notice board it has made me realise that I need to get back to feeling better about myself via my breathing and meditation. I’ve also remembered that women are the stronger of the species and why I remain single. That being a given what I will share with you is that when I do my breathing exercises daily and meditate twice daily I seem to give less of a flying f*#! in more eloquent terms if you are in a good place people around you tend to feel it and be in a good place to. So, don’t let the five-point plan destroy a lovely gesture. That is possibly why I’m stone cold crazy batshit.

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About micsirwin

I'm a Postgraduate student at Queens studying Criminology, writer, poet and lover of integrity, dignity, respect and morality
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